Life Choices

So...where to start? Where to start? I raced in the Alien Run and the Iron Horse again this year but got off to a late start with my training and as a result along with a spring cold, I finished later in both events than what I did last year.

I have finished the draft of my second book, the sequel to "Lost in Reality" but I can't settle on a title and I have a couple of friends reviewing to make sure it gets the right response.

I've been offered a new job with a major oil/gas producing company and my current employer does not want me to leave. However, I look forward to the challenges and opportunities that the new employer can provide me.

I'll be 46 years old June 10, but people think I'm still in my 30's...I'm pretty sure that's a good thing. :)

I've picked up an old car project that my 11 year old son is interested in. So, some great father son time!

I'm working on a project in my spare time to develop a "Virtual Mission Control" center that Jr. High and High School students from around the world can log in and partake in missions associated with Space Exploration, Deep Sea Exploration, Arctic Exploration, Weather Exploration, etc...More on that soon! It may get the backing of a NASA/Rice University Grant!

I gotta go for now, but I promise to update the ever changing status of some of these updates.

Have a great day!
James

Live an Extraordinary Life

So, what's up with the title? Well. I had a friend recently contact me asking about any websites I knew of for a friend of hers to go to where she could research and learn about and get support concerning her son who has multiple "facial differences". I thought for a minute before responding. I first directed her to this site and mentioned that there is a link to the right that I included to another site that a wonderful person put together full of endless resources and answers. There is a need for getting those answers and developing a clear understanding of the conditions. But, when all is said and done and the dust settles and the doctors have done everything they are capable of doing and the insurance has black-balled the patient, that's when I think a person could gain something by spending time on this "silly" seemingly non-related blog that I write. Why? Because at some point in my life I realized that my face didn't have to define who I was. I was going to title this posting "Live a normal life", but what the heck is that? What is normal? And beyond that, why JUST live a normal life when you can live an extraordinary life? I live a "normal" life and yet I strive for much more. Countless people have asked me how I manage to do so much in life. I guess there's just a LOT of things I want to do and see. So I work to fit all those things in. And believe it or not. There is still plenty of idle time still left over. To my fellow brothers and sisters who have been "plauged", "blessed", "cursed", or what ever title you have put on your condition---pursue your dreams. Press in hard and do your best to not look back. Except perhaps to witness that line of demarcation so you can see where you were and where you have come to a better place. I don't want anyone to think that my life has been exceptional from day one. I have spent countless hours fighting the ache in my heart, feeling cheated, feeling ugly, feeling lonely, feeling despised and rejected. I've been through all of those and more. But there has also been so much richness in my life. Unbelievable richness. My facial differences don't define who I am now, but they contributed toward what makes me who I am. I can't deny that. And I've told people I would never "wish" my condition upon another person, but I also would not choose to do it all over again with a "normal" face. There is a great deal of confidence, tenacity, endurance, love of life, etc...that has been deeply instilled in me as a result of my life experiences with facial differences.
To anyone out there who is struggling with being different from the "standard" be it physical or emotional, I am VERY sorry that you have to carry that burden. I can honestly share in your pain and suffering. I can honestly say that I've been there to a certain degree. I know there are folks who have far worse conditions than mine and my heart aches for them, and I wonder how they do it. Funny that I would say such a thing, but I have come to a place that I forget that I look different probably 90% of the time. It's crazy. But it's like I said early on in this posting. I am not defined by my facial differences. If anyone wants to talk more with me about this, please feel free to contact me. I believe my email is included on my profile page and I can be contacted via that or via replying to this post. Finally, read through my postings. Some are serious and some are silly. But hopefully, as you read through them you will begin to realize that you don't have to be different from everyone else. You just get out in the world and start living. One of those things that seems to be quite certain in the world we live in is that we can't turn back the clock. Oneo of my favorite phrases back in college, CARPE DIEM, "sieze the day".
Have a great day everyone.
James

Round Six-Two are Better Than One

What, you ask? Another mountain goat biking post? Yep, I respond. At least just this one more for now.

I want to get just a wee bit philosophical on you for a while. I took note of a very important truth as I was working my way up the mountain this morning. Two are better than one. It's as simple as this, since I don't have someone riding with me, I have to push myself as far as I am willing to go with the self inflicted pain. With another person who is in similar shape and sharing the same goal of improving their game, becoming better, we would very likely push each other on when we feel like giving into the groans of our bodies. That pushing on may not be much farther than we would have gone up the hill on our own, but it IS FARTHER.

So it is in our personal lives, as we strive to be better people, developing character, triumphing over life's struggles. When we are going it alone, we will fall or fail much sooner than if we are going through life with people with similar life goals. Simple lesson, simple reminder.

The other thing I've noticed as I've pained my way up the trail is that we have to discover the same willingness in our personal lives concerning character development or spirituality, sweating, hurting, struggling to overcome, that we do on the bike trail. Again, doing this with others is almost a guarantee toward success than doing it alone. I know this is often times easier said than done, but that's where we get encouragement, from others.

And finally, I promised to not get preachy on this blog, but I hope that this comes across as not preachy, but enlightening to ALL those who have been burned or turned off by church or religious experiences. A good friend of mine recently mentioned that they feel condemned every time they read the new testament. I couldn't find the right words at the time but now I think I have a better idea. I hate arguing religion with people, it rarely gets anywhere and it consumes large quantities of time and often leaves people offended or hurt. So, to put it simply, concerning the feeling of condemnation that some feel when reading the Bible: Take a look at the context 2000 years ago (although this still fits today with many church dwellers) when Jesus was confronting a person, for example equating a thought of hatred for someone the same as murdering them, look at it as a means to get everyone down to the same level, the same playing field. No pit was too deep, and no mountain was too high to separate EVERY person Jesus encountered. In His eyes they were all on the same level. His remarks were not of condemnation, they put everybody on the same page. No one was too good, no one was too bad. They ALL needed a Savior and the cost was the same for everyone of them. We all go through the same gate, there's no pit access for those who committed the worst of crimes and there is no hi-way for those who believed they were perfect and above it all. There IS NO condemnation, only a promise of new life.

There, that's it. I hope I didn't offend anyone, but this was a bit revelatory for me and so I wanted to share it with all of you.

Have a great day! If you are riding a mountain bike like me, have a great time riding and pushing yourself on to higher places.

James

Hemifacial Microsomia i.e. facial differences

So, where do I start. I could start all the way back "in the beginning", but not yet. I'll get there some day. Ever watch the movie "Benjamin Button". Not the same condition as mine, he just got back to the beginning in the end and I guarantee you that I will get there with this blog at the appropriate time.

My blog title "facial differences", so I've learned today, is the politically correct and much simpler term now associated with "Atresia-Mircotia Hemifacial Microsomia". That's me. When I was born, I had no right ear and my right jaw bone was underdeveloped. Apparently, this congenital (meaning it happened in the womb, not genetic, not inheritable), birth defect occurs in anywhere from 1 in 6,000 to 1 in 10,000 depending upon which websites you visit. One website actually indicated that the chances of my offspring inheriting this condition to be 1 in 33. Yikes! My doctors always told me that it doesn't happen since my condition is congenital, not genetic, however, 1 in 33 has more of a chance of a facial difference than 1 in 6,000. Thank God, both of my children came out perfectly normal.

I was born in 1965 (see? we're already back at the beginning) at a time just prior to the pioneering days of "plastic surgery". I make that statement with the understanding that many reconstructive surgical techniques were "invented" and practiced in the fields of the Vietnam war. My first "corrections" occured at the Balboa Naval Hospital in San Diego. Those corrections involved skin grafting and a plastic insert to build an ear and bone grafting from a partial rib to lengthen and reshape my right jaw bone. I was about 5 years old when those surgeries occured. This was my first exposure to a hospital- military hospital- a ward full of children with a variey of infirmities. That was also back in the days when they knocked us out with a form of engine starting fluid, you know, ether. I remember being terrified and I seem to remember that my folks didn't get to stay there after visiting hours, maybe they did and I just don't remember it correctly- sometimes remembering back to my 5 year old days when I'm now 44 is a bit scewed. I remember being a very sensitive child growing up. Crying a lot about a lot of things. Of course that may have just been my born-in personality. I did manage to grow up with the average bunch of kids- did the average kinds of things kids did. One thing that was NEVER in question was my parent's love and acceptance of me regardless of my condition. I do know that it was a burden to them both financially and emotionally. They never expressed that to me, but I could tell.

And since this is a blog and it is getting late and I have to tuck my kids in for the night, I'll end this session. Please feel free to visit from time to time. I will try to dialog with myself and hopefully I can offer some sanity, encouragement and hope to parents of kids like I was or those of you out there that share my condition.
Until then-
Have a great day!
James